My lunch break is waxing at the speed of light, and I have the luxury of the last 3 minutes to get something here "on paper". Before I move further, rhea, nina and aashoo .. thanks for having been there, seen that and left a note. However much you tell yourself that you don't write for recognition, there's a soft spot in the ego that definitely feels better when you know someone felt good coz of what you wrote.
Today had a wonderful start. One of my articles is finally on print. I would have wanted the first one to be in the Hindu Opinion Section, or in the cover pages of the India Today magazine. But, it's a modest start ... a start, still :) And before I could bask in that glory, thud comes a mail from my "boss" asking me to login to yahoo messenger's voice conference with my collaborators ... where they were singing sermons praising the pillars of platform independence. And god said, son you have had enough and the whole network goes down :) Shukriya mai baap! and off I am blogging my way through in a notepad. Mondays have never been my favorites. The weekend's magic takes its own sweet time to wear off my back. And when you spend a weekend like what I did ... enjoying romeo and juliet's love lores with a hot cup of "cafe au lait" sitting next to that huge window letting drops of the first summer showers sprinkle into my coffee, and reaching out from the second floor to save the suicidal rain drops from ending their lives; And when the rain ends, taking a walk through the empty roads intoxicated by the aroma of earth and sending a few drops to infinity by free-kicking them to the nearest lamp post; Sitting next to the old guy in the roadside singing with a harmonica and clapping for a minute and dropping a few cents once he's done to make him feel like the king of the world; Dozing off in the black leather couch watching 'friends' till late in the night, letting just your nostrills see the rest of the world through your warm blanket; Do all those and come back on monday to work on a "Platform independent unified architecture for Knowledge exchange" is definitely not a smooth transition don't you think :(
Anyways, that's life and I know it's neither the rain drops nor the guy with the harmonica who give me my daily bread. It's my Boss! Sometimes, it's amusing how what you say affects what you think. True most of the time, you say what you think .. .but so many times it happens to me that, what I say affects how I feel about something. And when I tell my friends here what amazing work I am doing, and what fantastic family I have, and how lucky I've been in life ... I surely feel better. Of course much better than how I feel when I crib my way to glory. All said and done, I know I've been destiny's favorite child. Sometimes when I actually crib, I seriously visualise god (if you are wondering how he looks like, he's tall, croggy, has a flowing white beard, is dressed in white and is very bright :)) looking at me with piercing eyes and I tell him, "just this one time. I feel good when I do that". Reminds me of something even more childlike .... when I was a kid my mom once told me that people who wake up and go to bed again out of laziness are punished by god. So, back when I was young, if I wake up suddenly and wanted to go to bed again ... I used to tell god to forgive me this one time as I am really feeling tired. Today, it was 7:30 and I wanted to sleep for some more time. I caught myself telling god to excuse me for the next 30 minutes :) old habits .. don't die at all. Oops .. my prof's online now and wants to talk with me. Ciao! Ciao!

  ¶ 12:24 AM 0 comments

  Did you guys know this ... type a hundred words, get the best words in the best place ... and just when you think, you are going to blog your way to infinity, out of sheer coincidence "crafted to perfection by the ill-luck", your fingers reach for the Escape key, and lo all that you wrote is gone! Is there anything more frustrating than helplessly looking at the screen finding amiss a hundred words ... that so beautifully described how you felt. Anyways, I still have some life left in my fingers ... I shall go on ....
Before losing it out to the "treacherous escape key", I was explaining how perplexed I was to categorise this blog. How would you classify, the ramblings of a lunatic, the complaints of a crying kid, and the last words of a dying man. Oh no .. wait. I am not one of those who's carrying his burden of life on his tender shoulders, and hiding tears under the skin folds under his eyes ... I am just another Happy Joe, who's lost amidst options ... and feeling morose, more so (- a nice anagram for morose don't you think) because the day sapped out the last bit of energy out of my slim frame.
Hmm.. I've already started feeling better. There are so many things about blogging that's very intriguing - The state of being there like a mass in an unknown land(for a second, close your eyes and imagine people like unformed chunks of matter expanding and contracting, and thus showing life, in a closed room. Cut the daylight, get some haze, some fluorescence, imagine you and I sitting so close together in a virtual room and blogging as if we weren't there beside), this anonymity, this feeling of "dancing in the rain, as if noone is watching" where you can say just about anything and don't give a damn if you have got the final punctuation right, this optimism (to believe some silly soul would actually got this far and read this - "Thanks a lot") , and this sense of freedom, beyond the shackles of repression that civilization forces. And so on and so forth goes the lore .. in the praise of the lord and the Internet ....
Does blogging actually have to make sense? Hats off to men who bring about a change in the life of millions, by taking sometime and blogging for a purpose. Sometimes, it's unbelievable to believe that our society has finally embraced a virtual alter-ego that's much more sound and loud than the mundane one surviving the dirty marshes of flesh and blood. Of course, where's there's light, there's dark, where's joy, there's pain .. and where's there's sense, there's ME :) I love movies like pulp fiction, being john malkovich, and adaptation - They are so complete - completely non-sensical (from a perspective of a 9-5 guy walking on earth and still breathing air). They don't intend to make sense. But they are poetically cacophonic, carefully careless .. just like how the clouds are. Do you actually believe that the wind and god sit together and decide what patterns to draw every living moment of the day. Nah! They aren't software professionals. But they still are a little too busy for all that. But, if you have the time and the heart to enjoy art, look nowhere but up above .. you find teddy bears, rabbits, angels, heart symbols (like woh! dil shaped walah balloons!!) ... just whatever you want to see ..
My room mate's calling. Seems it's time to live. I end here. Au revoir.

  ¶ 12:24 AM 1 comments