Iam a dead man. Iam happy with myself that I could make some time to pen a few lines here. Iam just back from my dance rehearsal. My second, in a lifetime, dance rehearsal. Where do I start? It's a colossus of emotions that Iam going through right now - a childlike joy in finally doing what I like and being appreciated for it. utter disbelief and frustration when I see men around me falling out like autumn leaves out of the project... I still remember the chill I felt in my spine when this realisation stuck me that the dance might not happen at all. And since yesterday evening, I have been campaigning to every soul, initiating the genesis of a MJ inside them, make them feel like an inevitable part of the project ... all for this selfish reason that I shouldn't lose this chance also.. all along I've been chasing chances to dance, missing them by a whisker. Iam not sure as to what's gonna happen this time... I've taken up the initiative to lead something that Iam neither a master nor an exponent of. All I can remember is how Stephen king ends his novel, "for once, this green mile seems a little too long".. the road to this mission of getting lost in the beats and moving in unison with my spirit seems a little long for this lifetime of mine.
I guess, it all goes in the making of what I want to be. The frustration, the realisation of human limits and the lesson that reality starts when ethics end and life is one act where you make no assumptions... about what drives men to perform, about consistency in thought, about forces much beyond the obvious that are crucial in making the man's mind. And when the day ends and I slump in my seat searching for life between these lines that I write, I know Iam a happy man. I know, that I shall give up anything in this world to sleep like a corpse in my bed - a smile etched on my face and a satisfaction that I've earned every minute of this rest. The future I see beyond is hectic... Dance rehearsals, client meetings, prototyping for the latest project, an extensive trip at the end of the week, occasions that cannot be missed and woven with this.... the daily chores of existence. I wouldn't lie that I see tomorow as clearly as a crystal. But I know for sure, that I love this feeling.  ¶ 1:35 PM